Unravelling the unicorn’s mystery

chuck-eats-unicornsLately, you may have noticed that I’ve been kind of MIA, or oot and aboot (sorry, Canadian here)(apology also due to being Canadian). I want to post more often–I really do. It’s just that my ‘real life’ is so distracting. Being a unicorn, it takes hours to comb through the horrible tangles in my mane, and get rid of the mites that live on my underside. Those really, really suck.

But in all seriousness–I’m not a unicorn. It might surprise you, especially those of you who clicked on my avatar just because you thought you were going to find a blog typed out entirely with hooves (thanks, autocorrect! hoeirhg0394h;a94hg904he). I’m a real human person with real human person things to do and it’s not always possible to sit down and write an entry, even for a few hours. I started this blog to have a place to write down and share some of my weird thoughts and ideas, but in the meantime I seem to have stumbled upon a very lively and engaged blogging community. And with that, I have to say that I wish I could be here for you more often. I’m like that estranged relative (not the creepy uncle though) who is around sometimes, and is very into ‘what you’re doing’, and then disappears for a few months. And maybe sends you some money in the mail because he may not be in love with your mother anymore but he still loves you.

Anyway, back to my point: two bloggers nominated me for a Liebster Award (it’s a props to an up-and-coming blogger)! Thanks so much to Alexandra and Ross who actually think I’m funny and/or interesting. They are funny and interesting themselves, and I strongly encourage checking out their blogs. Now, to follow the rules of the Liebster Award. Hopefully I do it right, lest I upset the award regulators (P.S. There IS a team of judges and regulators, right?).

Proudly display the award banner:

Here it is.


11 things about yourself:

I’m going to give you some basic info (considering I’ve been purposely staying pretty anonymous) but I’ll also tell you some things that not even my own ‘real life’ friends may know about me. That’s how special you are.

1. I’m a 25-26-year-old female. Who just had her birthday. So that’s why she had to think about that whole age thing for a second. Also, blonde, which helps to explain prior comment.

2. I have a flat spot on my head. I mean, a VERY flat spot, like I was dropped as a child. You could rest a beer can on it (that was for the perves out there). If I ever had to shave my head, I’d have to wear a wig because birds would land and poop on it. I mentioned it to my mother a few years ago and she was ‘shocked’.

“How did that happen?”

“You tell me, MOM…”

3. My driver’s license number is one digit, repeated six times, followed by another digit. I won’t tell you which digits because I don’t ‘believe’ in stalking, but I’ve never had to pull it out of my wallet to remember the number. AMAZING. It’s magical, being able to do this.

4. My first concert was the Backstreet Boys. Not ashamed.

Yup, that's how I remember loving them. Nick Carter was a dreamboat.

Yup, that’s how I remember loving them. Nick Carter was a dreamboat.

5. I write short stories, long stories, poems, and plays. I’ve won a few local youth awards for some of my plays. The weird thing is, the ones I put the least effort into win awards, and the ones that earn my blood and sweat don’t earn much more than that. Moral of the story: don’t try. (???)

6. My favorite movie is The Departed, only because I can watch it over and over and still enjoy it. Maybe Fight Club, too. Okay, maybe I don’t have one favorite movie. And don’t get me started on cartoons, because I have a long list…and that list includes Fern Gully, All Dogs Go To Heaven, and The Land Before Time. I will sing you all of the songs from All Dogs Go To Heaven.

7. If I could live in any city in the world aside from my current location (Vancouver, Canada), I would live in Stockholm, Sweden. It reminds me of home, but with even higher standards of living. Tons of little islands connected by bridges, insane nightlife, clean (looking) streets, bars and other drinking establishments in every nook and cranny (found one tucked under a bridge), beautiful people, modern meets medieval architecture, and the list just goes on. If you haven’t been, go.

It's not even fair.

It’s not even fair.

8. After 26 years of wanting to write a novel but never finishing, I finally did it! But you can’t read it. Unless I publish it. Then we’ll see. Aside from publishing a novel, I’ve also always wanted to publish articles. But I’ve never made the time to put anything solid together.

9. I may look normal but I’m pretty weird…I have a horrible sense of humor, as I’m sure you know, and I like saying things to shock people. I’m a fan of Cards Against Humanity. I like to make dark jokes. I like to take uncomfortable situations and laugh about them, because when you think about it, sometimes it’s better than crying.


10. I used to want to be a palaeontologist (my favorite dinosaur? Probably pachycephalosaurus). Then an architect. Then a broadcast journalist. I volunteered as a reporter at the 2010 Olympics in Vancouver and took some more of my pro bono journalism experience and applied it to my current job in public relations, which I absolutely love.

11. I’m a drummer. I play metal. I play double kick and I don’t suck at it. I am able to achieve these things and don’t even look like a man. U mad bro? I played classical piano for 9 years before I started drumming.

I’m going to elaborate on this question, because the lovely Becca at 25tofly asked how I got into drumming. I was a young, nubile, supple fifth-grader (uncomfortable yet?) who wanted to join the school band the following year. Mom came with me to the info session with the music teacher. I already played piano but there wasn’t one in the band. I asked the teacher “what’s the most difficult instrument in the band to learn?” (because I was a little self-centered know-it-all) She replied, “French horn or drums.” My mother looked at me with a raised eyebrow, then turned to the music teacher to ask how much it would cost to take up either instrument.

“The French horn will be a few hundred dollars to rent for the year. But we have drums at school, so she’d only need sticks, a practice pad and the music book.”

“You’re playing drums.”

And that was that. I had to promise never to ask for my own drum kit. But three years and much teary-eyed begging later, my grandparents helped me buy my own kit. It lived in our one-car garage, and I had to set it up and take it down every time I played it. So I didn’t play it much–not to mention, every time I drummed in there, spiders would freak out from the vibrating ceiling and drop down on to me and my drums. Like I said, I didn’t practice much.

I played in concert band and jazz band at school, and the local concert band as well. Then I drummed in the musicals. Then there was my first ‘band’ when I was 14–we only knew one song, and it was this one. But I was 15 when I joined a friend’s band from another school and started playing local gigs. They were all at community centers, but it was the cool thing to do at the time. After that, I was in a grunge band, experimental rock band, ska band, post-hardcore band, and folk metal band before I got together with my current bandmates and started playing death/thrash metal. It’s fast, aggressive, rhythmic, and heavy. Very fun for a drummer who likes to play complicated stuff.

Last tour was fun.

Last tour was fun.

That’s it! Oh, and Zac Hanson was my hero.

Choose other bloggers to nominate:

I know that to ‘qualify’ for a Liebster Award, you need to have less than 200 followers. However, going through the list of blogs I regularly read, most of them have over 200. So I will give you a few links to blogs I like–some have over 200, and some under.

1. Alana T Photography – Sassy and fun, and she’s doing this amazing photo project right now that takes women’s insecurities and flips them around into something beautiful. SHE GOT ME SAPPY! And that’s hard to pull off.

2. Vyvacious – Vyv was the first person to really jump on board Cruella de Kill and is actually Batman in disguise. She makes amazing food, and also–SMOREOS? It’s not even fair. Hers is a fun blog to read!

3. How Not To Kill Your Parents – Insightful life commentary that is utterly familiar for most of us.

2. Victoria Elizabeth Barnes – Funniest gal ever! And I’m a sucker for interior design, and this lovely lady blogs often about restoring her home, and the hilarious things that happens during renovations.

3. 25tofly Pretty sure she’s had a bajillion of these nominations, and probably more than 200 followers, but I don’t care. I want you to read her blog. You’ll see why when you get there.

Ask your nominees some questions:

1. What’s the weirdest thing someone has ever said to you?

2. If you could go back in time and change one thing about your life, what would it be and why?

3. If you could domesticate and train any animal to do your bidding, which animal would it be, and what task would you assign to them?

4. What would you do for a Klondike bar? I mean, a REALLY good Klondike bar?

5. Who is your daddy, and what does he do?

That’s all, folks! I’ll still try to post as often as I can. The real reason I’ve been MIA is because my band has been in the studio every weekend for the last month and the only time I can sit down and write is generally on weekends. It’s okay–momma’s here for you now.

For those reading this, feel free to answer some of my nominee questions in the comments below–I’m actually pretty curious. Especially which animals you’d recruit to do your bidding.